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katherine crowe: Blog

The Tribute Show

Posted on August 13, 2014 with 0 comments
Well my little schemes and plans are starting to happen and we are going to do a concert for Kath's memory.

Somehow, her band and some lovely special guests will try and recreate her bestest bits. We are organising a fantastic little orchestra and Kath's amazing band all of whom are precious friends will be playing their socks of as a few of us nervously try and fill her shoes on the stage.

It will be amazing and the only tragedy is that she would have LOVED to play at this show. It's a huge undertaking and I'm hoping it keeps the wolf from the door and not the other way round but it's what she would have done so I won't sell her short.

If you build it...they will come. She loved that quote.

Share and please come and spend a last night in her presence. It will be all of our honour to do this.

Big Love XX

Holidays and happenings.

Posted on August 13, 2014 with 0 comments
Sorry it's been ages. I'm keeping busy and this takes the right headspace to write.

Had to re-read my last blog to even know where I was up to. Goodness me. Things have moved on in a great way.

We took our little van to see the grandparents and Auntie Becky and the kids in Wales. And I rediscovered myself as me. Thanks to our lovely family the kids did a load of sleepovers and it meant I could disappear and be alone. (with the dog....thanks for our dog lovely girl XX)

So what to do. My lovely friend Hayley had bought me some T shirts and stuff for a kayaking expedition. We were attempting to get round the Isle of Man in three to four days unaided, with one experienced and two very intermediate paddlers (me and Jed) with a couple of cracking instructors from the venture centre. Long story short we had to abandon as it was a bit rough and these tides are not to be messed with. That was my first "me" time I've had in a long while and it was precious.

So back to the T shirt... It is basically [...]
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Silver linings

Posted on June 5, 2014 with 6 comments
Sorry, it's been a while.

Where to start and where to go with this...hmmm.

Well I was planning a trip away with the kids when it became inevitable that we would be on our own quite soon. But what to do? We could have a week or two in Greece on the beach but coming home to a cold and empty house is bad enough at the best of times. So the idea formed that I should get a camper van so that we could always just shoot off when we feel like it. And that's what I did. I found a lovely silver VW that has enough seats for parties and enough room for me, the kids and the dog to go anywhere for a night or two. And thanks to the lovely people that sold it to us they let me take it away the day I test drove it. On his insurance and still in his name we went camping for the night. You only really get that sort of trust on our little island.

Going back to last year, there are a couple of teenagers who have shown a level of maturity and kindness that astounded me. The lads, now 12 and 14, are the kids [...]
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My worst fear.

Posted on May 15, 2014 with 9 comments
So now it's time to slow down and start on the next thing and the next thing. I had to force my daughter to school at gunpoint this morning and she had a huge blowout last night. Exhaustion and knowing the cousins and grandparents were leaving to pick up their own lives in West Wales. Add to that the sheer stress, and last night became the moment I feared most.

When someone is ill for a time you have a chance to start to deal with the loss. But I knew watching my kids struggle would be the hard part. And so it happened with my daughter last night. She screamed and she bawled and thanks to Hayley, our little angel, we managed to take turns just sitting with her.
It started because she refused to go back to school, but half an hour in to her screaming session I think she had a realisation.

"I want Mum!" The words hit you like a brick and there's nothing you can do. I realised why this happened as well. It's because I could not be negotiated with so she would usually get her mum to "reason" [...]
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What now?

Posted on May 15, 2014 with 3 comments
I'm not quite sure what i'm doing here so i'll just give a little update to the no facebook brigade.

I've just waved Kath's parents and her big sister off and more or less will be back to normal.

Since Kath went I have been going at 200 miles an hour preparing for the funeral and stuff. On the thursday, the day after, I literally didn't look up from a phone or computer until about 7 at night. Took a deep breath and felt just like we used to arranging a big gig. And that's what I have been doing. The biggest gig of our lives.

It's fairly easy with a support network like Kath has, but I had to keep tabs on all the details I could. The Church service wasn't as overcrowded as I was fearing. Just a nice church full of people who were close to us. Balloons hanging and pinging around when they were attached to kids. Cushions for them to snuggle up and a very special reading of Denzil the Mouse made it just how she would have wanted it.

Kath hated kids to be excluded or ignored. We rarely [...]
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